


Magnus Burnsides, Arospec Disaster

by waitineedaname



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Aromantic Magnus Burnsides, F/M, though he figures out he's actually arospec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2019-06-01 13:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15144554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waitineedaname/pseuds/waitineedaname
Summary: Mango Sunburns:anyway can anyone let me know what a crush is likeMango Sunburns:bc uhJarold:holy shitMango Sunburns:I think I might have one#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:LKJFSDLKFNLSDKHKFLS#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:!!!!!!!!!!!!





	Magnus Burnsides, Arospec Disaster

**Author's Note:**

> I was possessed by the desire to write a texting fic that takes place in these seven disasters' group chat, and then I was possessed by the desire to write about aro Magnus figuring out he's actually gray-aro, and now here we are
> 
> also I can't FUCKING think of titles

**Mango Sunburns:** hey uh

**Mango Sunburns:** I’m the only aro one here right

**Lucretia:** Somehow, in this group of disasters queers, you are the only aromantic, yes

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** excuse i am a functional bi

**Lucretia:** I have screenshots of four years of pining before you and Barry got together. Do you want me to put you on blast?

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** okay fair

**Jarold:** aw babe <3

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** <3

**Mango Sunburns:** gross

**Mango Sunburns:** anyway can anyone let me know what a crush is like

**Mango Sunburns:** bc uh

**Jarold:** holy shit

**Mango Sunburns:** I think I might have one

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** LKJFSDLKFNLSDKHKFLS

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** !!!!!!!!!!!!

**Lucretia:** That’s very exciting, Magnus

**Merlegaritaville:** Make sure to use protection

**Come to Del Taako:** lup just kicked down my door and interrupted a PERFECTLY GOOD NAP to tell me to read this

**Come to Del Taako:** mags u legally have to tell me everything about this person so I can stalk them

**Mango Sunburns:** okay @merle I’ve had sex before, im not dumb, also this is like. a romantic thing, not just a sex thing

**Merlegaritaville:** An emotional condom

**Jarold:** that’s what I call my anxiety meds

**Mango Sunburns:** and @taako her name is Julia, she works at the dog groomers place I take Johann to

**Come to Del Taako:** looks like im taking taaquito to get groomed

**Mango Sunburns:** she’s like really pretty and really nice and she’s alos like??? really funny???? And like. Idk this feels different than a physical thing or a platonic thing, like i wanna take her out to dinner and make her happy and spend all my time getting to know what she likes and dislikes and what makes her laugh and what her favorite food is

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** this is some sappy shit and im dating /Barry/

**Mango Sunburns:** also she could suplex me instantly and I think I’m wanna marry her

**Jarold:** moving a little fast

**Lucretia:** That’s sweet, she sounds nice

**Mango Sunburns:** what do I do?? These feelings are New and I’m Aro And Confused

**Come to Del Taako:** isn’t aro and confused just your natural state

**Cap’n’port:** Do you think she might be interested in you too?

**Jarold:** holy shit Dav I thought you removed yourself from this group chat months ago

**Cap’n’port:** No, I just put it on mute when Taako was drunk and talking about that Kravitz guy.

**Come to Del Taako:** IM

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** ROAST

**Cap’n’port:** Is that what you kids call a “sick burn”?

**Lucretia:** It absolutely is, good job.

**Come to Del Taako:** STOP ENCOURAGING HIM

**Cap’n’port:** Anyway, Merle told me to check it because something important was being discussed.

**Mango Sunburns:** idk I think she is??? She’s kinda been flirting and like. normally I try to shut that down if I think it’s going in the romantic direction bc like I dont want anyone to get their hopes up, but,,, I haven’t with her bc I kinda like it

**Mango Sunburns:** which is weird bc I normally feel uncomfortable with flirting unless I know it’s only a one night fling kinda thng

**Mango Sunburns:** but I want more than that with her?? What Do

**Cap’n’port:** I would say go for it. Just make sure she has an out, especially since you know her through her job. Don’t make her uncomfortable at her workplace.

**Cap’n’port:** Also, Magnus, I know you love rushing in, but I’d recommend taking this one a little slow.

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** Davenport dishing out that Good Advice

**Cap’n’port:** I always give good advice.

**Merlegaritaville:** That’s a goddamn lie

**Come to Del Taako:** yeah man do you WANT us to list all the dumb shit you’ve done

**Cap’n’port:** Absolutely not and I’m muting you all again because I’ve never been wrong.

**Come to Del Taako:** creesh I KNOW you got those folders of receipts of all of us being dumb, you still got dav’s?

**Lucretia:** Oh, you know it.

_ [Lucretia sent 14 images] _

**#changeLucretia’sname2kforever:** GET HIM

**Cap’n’port:** This is libel.

 

\--

 

It had been several days since Magnus first proposed the idea that he might have a crush to the group, but he had yet to act on it. Truth was, he had  _ no  _ idea what to do. The boundaries between platonic and romantic had always been weird ones to define, especially being a naturally affectionate person that loves his friends with his everything; he wasn’t sure what kind of event was good for a first date, or even what he should do at said date. 

Was a kiss too far for the first date? Holding hands was good, right? Was dinner a good first date or was that too fancy? How would he make sure she knows this is a romantic thing, since he goes out to dinner with his friends all the time? Plus there was the problem that he had  _ just  _ taken Johann to get groomed, and he didn’t have any excuse to go see her until Johann’s fur had grown out again. 

Which led him to where he was now, complaining about all of this while accompanying Taako on his errands. He let out a deep sigh as he finished his long ramble of aro-spectrum stress and he could tell that Taako was rolling his eyes behind his sunglasses.

“Jiminy crickets, and you tell me _ I’m  _ dramatic.”

“What do I do?” Magnus whined, ignoring the comment. Taako sucked on his teeth, brow furrowed in thought.

“Well,” He started, pausing on the sidewalk to let his emotional support dog, Taaquito, sniff at a tree, “Dinner’s probably too much. Lunch is always a good place to start. Maybe a soup and sandwich place? With gluten free and vegan options, don’t wanna make shit awkward for her if she’s got dietary restrictions. A kiss  _ might  _ be too much right off the bat, but if she goes for it, hey.”

“And what if she thinks this is a friend thing? I’m totally cool with it being that at first, but… you know.”

“Dunno man. Krav thought I was trying to bribe him into something on our first date. Just be forward, I guess. Say ‘hey, wanna go on a date’.”

“Okay.” Magnus worried his lip, trying to internalize all the advice. Taako gave him a sidelong look.

“You got it? Because we’re about two seconds from asking her.”

“Wait, what?” Magnus paled as he realized Taako was leading them right down the road to the groomers. “Oh, shit- No, Taako, we can’t come down here just for me to ask her!”

“I dunno what you’re talking about, I’m here to get Taaquito here a bath.” Taako smirked, pushing open the door before Magnus could complain any further.

The bell rang, announcing their presence, and a call of “Just a minute!” came from the back room. Just a second later, a woman with a friendly smile walked in. She was much shorter than both of them, but nearly as broad as Magnus. Her dark, curly hair was pulled back in a bandanna and there was dog fur on her jeans. As soon as her eyes landed on them, her smile grew. “Well hey, Magnus! Where’s Johann?”

Magnus opened his mouth, unsure of what to say, but Taako saved him from embarrassing himself. “Actually, I’m here to get a bath for my dog.”

“Ah!” Julia crouched down and presented her hand for the retriever to sniff. “What a handsome fella, what’s his name?”

“Taaquito.”

“Nice to meet you, Taaquito.” The dog licked her face and she laughed. “Service dog, right? Alyssa in the back can take you.” She nodded down the hall, standing up again. Taako started down that way, sending Magnus a brief ‘talk to her, dumbass’ look before disappearing. Magnus swallowed thickly.

“Hey, uh. Julia?” Magnus started. She had slipped behind the main counter and was typing something on the computer, but she looked over as soon as he spoke.

“Yeah, Magnus? What’s up?”

“Are you- When does your shift end?” He winced immediately at the awkwardness of the question, but she seemed unfazed.

“Right now, actually! I’m clocking out.” She nodded towards the screen.

“Oh! Great!” Magnus took a deep breath. Now or never. “Do you- you can totally say no because I know it’s bad taste to ask out someone that’s working because they’re being paid to be nice and if this makes you uncomfortable, I could go somewhere else and you’ll never have to see me again, but- do you wanna go get lunch? Like, as a date? Maybe tomorrow?”

As soon as he said it, he clammed up, deathly afraid of the reaction he might receive. Was that what Taako meant by telling him to be forward? Was it too much? He really shouldn’t have rambled so much at the start- or maybe he didn’t give enough preamble, maybe he should have made it especially clear that she could tell him to fuck off if she wasn’t interested. Fuck, he shouldn’t have done this while she was at work either, that’s all kinds of unsavory, he just fucked this up all kinds of ways and- 

“Yeah! Here-” She fished a phone out of her pocket and handed it to him, opened up to a new message. “Text yourself.”

Magnus stared at the phone like he’d been handed a holy relic, then got ahold of himself and typed in his number, sending a quick “this is magnus” text to himself. 

“Do you have anywhere specific in mind? Because there’s this really great place near where I live with, like, fist-sized tater tots.” Julia said, taking her phone back and putting it back in her pocket.

“Yeah! Yeah, that sounds perfect, just- just text me the name of it.” Magnus could feel his soul floating up into the ether in joy. 

“Great.” Julia smiled and gathered her stuff. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Not if I see you first!” He said in an awkward attempt to appear less astonished, and his heart swelled when she laughed at his admittedly terrible joke. She squeezed his arm with a surprisingly firm grip and headed to the door.

“See you then, Magnus!”

Magnus stared at the door for a solid minute after she left, dumbfounded that it had gone so well, then jolted back to his sense and pulled out his phone. His screen was dominated by Barry and Lup sending Bohemian Rhapsody lyrics to the group chat and Lucretia threatening to block them, but he ignored them to open up the message from Julia’s phone. With a small smile on his face, he added Julia to his contacts with a dog emoji and - after a moment of hesitation - a heart.

He might be an arospec disaster, but he had a  _ date  _ tomorrow. 

**Author's Note:**

> come yell about arospec magnus with me on my tumblr @waitineedaname !!!!!!!!!!!


End file.
